Why is this a difficult concept guys!?

I am curious if anyone else has this issue with their spouse. We seem to differ on this one subject and its ends up to be a bit of a pissing contest if you will.
He goes to work and school and as most people doesn't like his job and wishes he could just quit.. I get that.. he works security and it's lame and lacks any fulfillment, fine.
I being a stay at home mom and pretty much the sole protector of our life right now take care of everything else. From taking care of the kids and the house to getting repairs done on the car, filling it with gas and even paying bills.
Yes I do not have a tangible income but my employer.. if one exists is my husband right? So why is it that the role of being at home is misunderstood to be 'soo much easier'? I know he doesn't have it easy but neither do I. I only feel this way when what I do is belittled like this. I am a good mom, my kids are good and healthy, our house and finances are in order but somehow the process is ignored or rather just not seen so therefor fantasy?
Anyways, I have been married a few years now and we have made things work so far but it seems like this is something that is going to be a giant hurdle for me. Is it wrong to need some understanding and appreciation? It's like mom used to say, 'These dishes aren't gonna wash themselves!' Nope I am gonna have to do it no matter how much I hate the wrinkly, dry feeling I get from the soap!