more pics

Christmas!

Resenting Christmas?! Stupid SCROOGE!

OK i know it sounds bad and its not christmas persay that i resent... its the scrooge that i am married to. He refused to go look at christmas lights with us because it was a waste and stupid. He also has been so busy at work that he only got me a gift yesterday ><. I picked out everything i got the kids by myself and yet he told someone today what 'we' got the kids... makes me just not wanna have christmas so i don't have to feel so crappy and mad about it all. Are alot of people like this? Anti holidays kinda thing or is my husband a freak? lol Argh i am gonna lose my mind! Well i hope you guys enjoy yours lol I am gonna make do and enjoy it with the boys despite the grumpy old man in the other room!

Oh yah Mikey is potty trained by the way =D

Ok then if my laptop will stop interferring in my blogging i can tell you what i was gonna tell you sheesh! So we don't have any grand pictures from thanksgiving even though we did have a good time. We had a family get together with Jesi, Dana, JR and Zane. Dana is a great cook and it was fabulous day =). Now christmas is only a few days away and we have prepared as much as we are able lol so i thought i would share some of the evidence that Brian is here and part of christmas for the first time in 3 years! Here we have Brian and his friend 'Janasko' putting up lights...
and here we have Mikey and Juju showing off the poohbear christmas toy.


and here is a silly picture of Mikeys fav place in the house



Hope you all have a great christmas and happy new year =) more to come after the 25th =D

ya um i am a retard yay!

not sure what i just did...

this is Juju singing 'i am a child of god'

What the ... crap?

Mikey is still on the border between babyhood and bigboyhood .... closer to the latter. This is good and he is smart so he is doing well i am just a little shocked at the well quantity of his um... successes? I am just not sure whether i am supposed to be proud or disgusted when he shows me the 3lb lovely he left in the big boy potty... *barf* I will be so glad when my childrens bodily function are not worthy of celebration! Oh and a what the duece moment here in j ville... its snowing! Awkward! (see vid) Ok now lets see we have... 7.5 months left.... Hooray!! Alright naptime is almost up i better go.

Halloween pics

News?...

Well i have not been able to make a post for a while ... i kinda sorta broke my laptop and had to send it in.. something about frying my motherboard? Anywho yay i have it back and i have to try hard not to break it again.. ok so what has been going on? Well Mikey is almost completely potty trained... he spends most the day pantsless but he goes in the little potty now instead of the floor lol. Juju is doing well in school and they have him in some special programs to help him catch up to the other kids... not like special ed but like speech therapy and stuff. Anywho ya um Brian was on the phone with the lady from his potential school last night and she is calling tonight to get his application in I think. I am well the same as always just trying to keep it together. The boys are making it extremley difficult though. They decided to color the walls for me with markers... still tryin to get it off... mikey got a dvd shoved to far in the dvd player so i had to take it apart. but this is all part of the job right? lol man i hope so . Well i have pics from halloween i will put up as soon as i can find my cord so stay tuned!

Moving...

So we will be moving soon and i can't say for sure but i am pretty sure it will be to Henderson, NV which is good and bad i guess. Good because we will be closer to home but i am nervius about livin that close to Vegas.. is that city racist? Is that even a real concept? lol Does Vegas scare anyone else or am i a huge sissy?

I HATE potty training

OK so how is it fair that I have to now potty train Mikey too since Brian is at work all the time? Well its not and holy crap I am sick of getting peed on I know Juju wasn't easy either but it's easy to forget the pain once you are past it right? GAH! What am i gonna do? He is soo big he barely fits on the training potty and he sprays everywhere! *sigh* If only I had a girl to potty train it would be sooo much easier! Seriously though.... it is Brians turn to deal with this!

Exhaustion

I am so glad we are getting out soon. i cant take much more of this crap. Brian told me last night when he called from VA that when they get back his unit wants to go to the rifle range for the second time in the last 2 months to do quals since it is a new fiscal year... honestly am i allowed to spend time with my husband? he was my husband before he was a marine but i have not seen him more than a few hours a night since he got back in may. not only do i miss him but the kids miss him and they are making me insane! I know this is just normal kids stuff but i have dealt with everything on my own since his first deployment. I feel so freaking wiped out and all i wanna do is sleep and maybe have an evening where i don't have to listen to all the screaming and chatter and get climbed like a jungle gym. Mom better believe that when we get back she is watching the kids for a day or 2 so i can sleep lol. I feel like the mother of twin newborns,,, no sleep and constantly up with the kids. Its hard on them... daddy being gone all the time and they have nightmares too. *sigh* I love them so much and know if i don't care for them no one will do it for me i am just running outta steam. I am pooped lol. Any who we get to be a family again soon =)

what we have been up to...

Thought i could put a few more things up. They grow so fast and Juju is doing so well at school. Its awesome! =) One a pic of our fav store in jacksonville =)

Twilight

I had probably 5 of my friends in a weeks time tell me i needed to read this book and i was reluctant till i found that an lds girl wrote it.. is that stupid of me to be biased about books? Hmm any who i read it slowly at first but this morning i got to the last probably third od it... i like it of course but i am a little confused... have any of you read this book and been a little shocked at it? like for instance the guy stays in her room all night? hardly an lds girl thing to do but i guess i have to presume the main characters are not Mormon and i suppose if she were it would be a bit less exciting heck i don't know but it is still a good read. Gonna go finish it now so i can start the second one tomorrow. =)

I guess you are right...

After a long conversation and now another therapy session i have come to the conclusion that i am and will be ok. I have always been too hard on myself and failed miserably at life (at least i thought i did). I now realize that as someone recently told me i take things too personally... not an insulting you take things too personally but like lighten up its not that big a deal kinda thing. So now what? If i am to do as my therapist says and let go of the negative self image what am i left with? Who am i without all the drama? I don't really want my life to be worse than daytime tv anymore i swear i just have been so used to it that i am now at a loss as to who i really am... i had a glimpse of who i wanted to be a few years ago but is that who i really am? maybe only time will tell in the meantime despite all the crap life hands us we are gonna be ok just like we have been for the last 5 years... we had our 5 year anniversary btw and he bought me this awesome 130 dollar vaccum which to me seems and insane amount to spend on a vaccum but i love it anyways. Besides Dana got a dyson that was roughly 800 dollars i think. I know what you are thinking HOLY FREAKING CRAP! 800 dollars for a vaccum!? but hey to each their own right? =)

Hannah is gone!

Thankfully hannah passed over us with minimal effect... less for those who got to sleep through it >< unfortunately i sleep very light so i was awake and freaking out from 1 am when the power went out to about 9 when it came back on... i slept a bit here and there but it was loud as heck and it was like the scene in twister when they are at the drive in movie place.. the dark clouds and lots of wind... ya super creepy... i had to make myself stop asking god to save us. The best part was finally getting up in the morning and seeing the entertainment center my neighbors had put on the curb (in one piece at the time) in a million pieces. Thankfully none went through a window LOL. Any who it looks like Ike is passing around us so hallelujah but i tell u what .. goin to the store and getting turned away because they are putting sheet metal on the windows is VERY SCARY! I cannot wait to be home!

Hurricane?!

So um ya we are getting a big hurricane this weekend.. it's a category one but the schools are shutting down and i think base is too .... kinda freaks me out... this is the first one i have really been IN so i am a little nervous.... please pray we survive!

Boys will be boys!

The couch is a fun toy to my kids.. not sure why but watch what they like to do on it...
here is another cute one of the boys being bobble heads

Brian's First Day of school!

It is official my little boy started school today! Granted it is only preschool but hey still school. I didnt cry or anything so gimme a break sheesh! Actually to be honest i wasn't even there to drop him off... Brian took him lol i just hope he remembers to pick him up on time! it's so quiet here when he isn't here... i actually have time to do my own stuff while the other 2 sleep now! woo hoo! Well here is a pic of him on his way!

and here is one of him eating lunch just before he left

and another...

how bout a video!?

Like i promised

Brians' friend John and the boys
Brian and his are you serious eye
Mikey at Hammocks Beach
Juju and chocolate milk at Hammocks Beach
Hammocks Beach
My fat butt at Hammocks Beach

Only the beginning...

Well i suppose it's finally time to make one of these things.. just about everyone i know has one so hooray conformity! Like most of you i wonder if people are even going to read this and i just hope i am interesting enough to keep you reading.

So lets see... lets start by introducing the family... as most of you know in September 2003 i married Brian Libby and shortly after we had our son Brian aka Jujubee i would say technically he was our first son but we do have another son that was adopted before we got married... I'll get to him a bit later. OK, so we have Juju and then about 16 months later i had Michael. For a while i was making sure not to have more kids because i needed a break physically and now Mikey is 3 and we can't get pregnant... i hope i can get a girl before i am 40 LOL.

Brian and i have been steadily improving our lives as time passes... we started at the absolute bottom living with other people or in our car or in a trailer with single guys who liked to let potatoes grow in the walls... (yuck indeed) and now we are living in Jacksonville, NC. We are currently on base housing. Brian joined the marines in 2005 and this is where we were stationed. At first it wasn't so bad... we were finally in a place of our own on our own .. if that makes sense... well about 4 months after we got here, about July '06, Brian deployed to Iraq for the first time... that first deployment was really really hard..... it was very dangerous for the guys and we would go at least a month with no word from Brian. Losing him was very real and i thought about it way too much. I stayed here with the boys and we got to go home for Christmas that year. I don't think it helped very much though... i spent most of the visit crying because i missed him. He came home in February of '07 and was gone again in October '07. It may seem like he was home for a while but he was gone off and on a lot for training so I would say about 3 months he was home. This year he came home on his birthday, no joke on his birthday at like midnight. It may seem like there is a big gap i skipped but to be honest while he was deployed it was hard to do anything great.. the boys and i spent most of the time missing daddy.
The boys definately have grown up though. Juju is now 4 and he is starting preschool on Thursday. I finally got him potty trained and he has no accidents during the day and only at night when he is in my bed >< ya thanks for that Juju.. He is going to special therapy at school for speech and social stuff... he has a little lisp which makes him hard understand. One of the ladies doing his testing said he knows a lot of words, probably more than other kids his age he is just saying them funny. He learned to say his last name but he says Wibby instead of Libby, its really cute lol. The therapists also think he has some social skills that need work which i agree.. he is used to being the big brother and saying hey i want that toy and Mikey gives it to him. He also might have ADD i think he has a hard time sitting still but i am hoping that going to school and having that structure helps.
Michael on the other hand is doing well. granted he is not being tested for school yet lol but for one he speaks very clearly and he listens better. He is just really big. He is only 3 and he is wearing size 4 clothes .. the same as Juju... and actually he is in need of bigger clothes lol. He is a freaking giant. He likes being with mommy and just crowds the crap outta me lol. Did you know that becoming a mother means you are now a jungle gym? Hooray! Any who.. they are good boys and we are proud of them.
I have been struggling in NC. At first It was so nice to be on our own but lately i have been so overwhelmed that i cant get back to being me. I have gained a lot of weight here and with Brian's schedule the way it is i just don't have time to work out... not that i like to anyways lol. I just haven't had a job in almost 4 years... ok well i watch a friends little boy and have for um a year or so and i did clean houses out on Topsail beach last summer but i mean a real job you know? There isn't much i can do during the day with all the kids here the only thing in walking distance is little playgrounds and when we have heat advisories i can't take them out anyways. Ya in case you didn't know it gets really hot here. I know that these are all excuses but remember i had to be mom and dad for the last 3 years and even now that Brian is home i still can;t get relief. His battalion works him to death. So basically i am worn out and i don't eat regularly so i got fat since my body thinks it is starving to death and i am depressed to boot. Brian and i went to a counselor and were thinking we needed family counseling which turned out to be Shara needs tons of therapy so now i have 26 years of baggage to unload. Hopefully this all helps me get better though. I sure don't want to be angry the rest of my life.
Its not all as bad as i feel it is i am just overwhelmed and its hard to be happy lol i can't even manage to get myself to church and do my callings right now... Satan is kicking my butt. Brian thinks that things will all be better when we get back home which thankfully is soon. He gets out in May '09 so we are making preparations for the future. now that we finally are in a position to make big choices we are not sure which to make. We gotta figure out what to do about school and work and stuff... sometimes i feel like being an grown up is overrated lol. Ok well that's all for now i am gonna add some pics that you may have seen before but that's ok. Thank you for reading my rant =). Love you all.